Funny Cross Stitch Patterns Page 2

Normal Family - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$7.99  Sale $639
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"Remember, as far as anyone knows we are a nice normal family". Model stitched on 32 count Antique White Jobelan with Crescent Colours thread. Stitch count is 134W x 86H.
Hen Party - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Little House Needleworks
$7.00  $629
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Hen Party by Little House Needleworks features a cute farm scene with chickens roaming around in front of a house and red barn.

Model stitched on 28 ct. linen using DMC & Crescent Colours floss. The stitch count is 82 x 54 and the finished size is 5.86" x 3.86".

Uses Mill Hill Glass Seed Beads and a Tiny Tuscan Sun Swirly Bud by Just Another Button Company.
A Funny Little Sampler - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Shakespeare's Peddler
$12.00  $1079
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Pattern by Shakespeare's Peddler featuring a beautiful sampler design inspired by an old painting with lots of personality.

Pattern is stitched on 40 ct. Natural linen with DMC floss. The stitch count is 152 x 94 and the finished size is 7.8" x 4.7".
In Case of Cross Stitch - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lucy Beam Love in Stitches
$12.00  $1079
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Cross stitch pattern from Lucy Beam featuring a funny "In Case of Cross Stitch Break Glass" sign.

Pattern is stitched on 32 ct. Woodstove from Lapin Loops with Weeks Dye Works and DMC floss. The stitch count is 67 x 51 and the finished size is 4.19" x 3.19".
Seas and Greetings - Christmas Cross Stitch Pattern
by Frony Ritter Designs
$7.50  $675
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Cross stitch pattern from Frony Ritter Designs featuring a mermaid holding a garland with the words "Seas and Greetings".

Pattern is stitched on 16 ct. Pistachio aida. The stitch count is 97 x 97 and the finished size is 6.06" x 6.06".
Resting Stitch Face - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Hands On Design
$6.00  $539
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Model stitched over 2 threads with 32 Ct. Angel Wing from Fabrics by Stephanie with DMC floss. Stitch Count: 61 x 65. Finished size: 3 3/4" x 3 3/4".
Foxy The Imposter - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Romy's Creations
$12.00  $1079
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Pattern is stitched on 32 count linen fabrics with DMC. Stitch count: 71 x 68.
Warm Winter Wishes - Christmas Cross Stitch Pattern
by Waxing Moon Designs
$8.00  $719
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A snowman and his penguin friend warm themselves on a cold Winter night!

Model stitched on 28 Ct. Antique Blue Jobelan with Gentle Art Sampler Threads. Stitch Count: 86H x 85W. Design Size: 7" x 7"
Country Wise (Book 130) - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Prairie Schooler
$8.00  $719
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Pattern by Prairie Schooler featuring four fun decisions with cute sayings including, "Keep it Simple,", "Measure Twice, Cut Once", "Plan Ahead" and "The Witch is In".

Models stitched over two threads on 32 count linen using DMC thread. Stitch counts and... Read more
Is It Too Late? - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$6.00  $539
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A message to Santa: "Is it too late to be good?" Model stitched over two threads on 28 Ct. Cappuccino Country French Linen with Weeks Dye Works. Stitch Count: 39W x 81H.
Wear A Smile - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$5.00  $449
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Model stitched on 32 Ct. Hand Dyed African Daisy Jobelan with Weeks Dye Works. Stitch Count: 58W x 50H. Blue Flower Button sold separately.
Life's Journey - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Bobbie G Designs
$6.00  Sale $479
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"Life's journey is not to arrive safely at the grave in a well preserved body but rather to skid in sideways totally worn out shouting holy cow what a ride".
Model stitched on 14 Ct. White Aida with DMC floss.
Stitch Count: 84W x 144H. Design Size: 6" x 11"
Aged Wine - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Bobbie G Designs
$6.00  $539
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Pattern by Bobbie G Designs featuring some wine bottles with the phrase, "Wine gets better with age. The older I get the better I like it."

Model stitched on 14 count white cloth using DMC. Stitch count: 44W x 140H and the finished size is 3.14" x 10".
Humorous Halloween 4 Pack - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Pickle Barrel Designs
$12.00  Sale $959
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Model stitched on 14 ct. Aida in Natural Brown using DMC threads. Stitch count for Dead & Breakfast Inn is 45 x 61, Stay for a Bite 43 x 62, Get Sheet Faced 45 x 62, Boo Ya 42 x 58.
Follow Your Heart - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Silver Creek Samplers
$12.00  $1079
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Cross stitch pattern from Silver Creek Samplers featuring the sentiment "Follow your heart but take your stitching with you"!

Model stitched on 18ct Aida using a mixture of DMC and Weeks Dye Works thread. Stitch count is 80w x 80h and the finished size is 4.44" x 4.44".
Your Issues - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sue Hillis
$10.00  $899
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Sue Hillis pattern with the saying "Please cancel my subscription to your issues!"

Model stitched on 32ct Toasted Coconut by Colour and Cotton or a warm neutral beige of you choice using DMC or Sullivans thread. Stitch count: 110w x 102h. Stitch on fabric of your choice.
Underestimate Me - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Imaginating
$7.00  $629
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This design by Imaginating features a woman with a smirk and the text "Go ahead. Underestimate me. This will be fun."

Model stitched on 14ct White Aida using DMC thread. Stitch count: 118w x 95h.
Chocolate! - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Xs And Ohs
$12.00  Sale $959
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Cross stitch pattern from X's and Oh's featuring a bunny eating chocolate and the phrase "Chocolate...is God's way of saying he likes us a little chubby".

Model stitched on 14 ct lavender sunset aida using DMC or Anchor threads. Stitch count is 136 x 106.
Dear Santa - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Keslyn's
$14.50  $1305
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Cross stitch pattern from Keslyn's featuring a letter to Santa
Model stitched on 28 ct. White Lugana using DMC thread. Stitch count: 120w x 99h
Fowl Language - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Meridian Designs For Cross Stitch
$9.00  Sale $719
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Cross stitch pattern from Meridian Designs featuring a chicken and rooster with the phrase "Fluent in foul language"!
Model stitched on 32 ct. 'Amaryllis' Belfast from Under the Sea fabrics using DMC thread. Stitch count is 63 x 81.
Keep Looking Up - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Meridian Designs For Cross Stitch
$11.00  $989
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Cross stitch pattern from Meridian Designs featuring a dinosaurs watching a meteor fall from the sky with the phrase "Keep looking up"!
Model stitched on 32 ct. Freya Belfast using DMC thread. Stitch count is 100 x 99.
Green Thumb 4-Pack - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Pickle Barrel Designs
$12.00  Sale $959
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Cross stitch pattern from Pickle Barrel Designs featuring the silly phrases "You grow girl", "Gardening is dirt cheap", "Crazy plant lady" and "Sometimes I wet my plants"!

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Lemon Chiffon Aida using DMC floss. Stitch counts are 53... Read more
Shuts A Door - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Imaginating
$7.00  $629
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Cross Stitch pattern from Imaginating featuring the phrase "When life shuts a door, open it again, it's a door. That's how it works"!

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Black Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 100w x 128h.
Bad Snow Day - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sister Lou Stitches
$14.50  Sale $1159
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Cross stitch pattern from Sister Lou Stitches featuring a snowman having a really bad time at the beach..."It's a bad , bad day to be a snowman"!

Pattern is stitched on 18 ct Let's Build a Snowman from The Slovak Farm using DMC, Classic Colorworks, and Gentle Arts threads. Stitch count is 100 x 100.
Dsyfunctional - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Imaginating
$9.00  Sale $719
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Cross stitch pattern from Imaginating featuring the phrase "Let's put the fun back in dysfunctional"!

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct White Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 81w x 114h. Finished size is 5.79" x 8.14".
Ex People Person - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Imaginating
$9.00  $809
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For the social butterfly who's gracefully retired her wings. This cheeky pattern features the phrase "I used to be a people person but people ruined it for me"-complete with a no-nonsense lady throwing up the universal "nope" hands. Whether you're stitching for yourself or a... Read more
Friendly Advice - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Imaginating
$9.00  $809
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Witty, relatable, and just a little too real, this clever design perfectly captures the inner panic we all feel before hitting "send." With hand-drawn style lettering and expressive details, it blends humor and honesty into a piece that's guaranteed to get laughs and knowing nods. A fun... Read more
Common Sense - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  Sale $552
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Just a little cute saying - unfortunately that flower truly doesn't grow in everyone's garden.

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 60w x 62h.
Protecting Mama - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  $617
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My little dog barks at EVERYTHING! Maybe you know someone with one like that - or do you have one too.

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 92w x 107h.
Getting Older - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  $617
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Boy, is this a true statement.... and my body definitely isn't pleased, though I'm thankful for every day!

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 83 x 93.
Retired - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  $617
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What DO you call a person who's happy on Monday - well, retired seems a fitting term.

Pattern is stitched on 14 count White Aida using DMC or Anchor threads. Stitch count is 91 x 91.Anchor thread:ANC0229 is also needed. We do not carry.
Crazy Cat Person - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$7.00  $665
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Probably everyone who has multiple animals does this - I know I surely do. And, I ask the dog where the cats are.

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 105w x 74h.
Crazy Dog Person - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$7.00  Sale $595
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Well, I only have one dog - but I do ask him where the cats are. Most anyone with multiple animals is 'guilty' of this.

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 105w x 71h.
Growing Old - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  Sale $552
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Well, yeah I did - it just crept up on me. Maybe you're the same way - or know someone who is. Doesn't hurt to add a bit of humor!!

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 84w x 90h.
I Will Follow You - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  Sale $552
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If you have dogs or cats, you probably can relate to this. Especially in the world we live in now. My little furbabies think they have to go with me no matter what room I'm going in. "I will follow you wherever you go, bathroom included"!

Pattern is stitched on the fabric of your choice using DMC threads. Stitch count is 102 x 64.
Old and Wise - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  $617
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Well, I don't know about you, but if you're old, you were probably young and stupid at one time - I sure was. But.... now I'm wise! "The reason I'm old and wise is that God protected me when I was young and stupid"!

Pattern is stitched on the fabric of your choice using DMC threads. Stitch count is 89 x 89.
When I Was a Kid - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  $617
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This probably fits most of us... but when we get there, well, maybe being a kid isn't such a bad thing after all.

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 95w x 91h.
Sit on the Floor - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  Sale $552
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I must admit, I have to remind myself of that pretty often - because, without a plan, I'm sorta stuck. "Note to self, do not sit on the floor without a plan on how to get up"!

Pattern is stitched on the fabric of your choice using DMC threads. Stitch count is 98 x 115.
Good Grief - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  Sale $552
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Well this describes me perfectly. It can almost be looking at me and I still can't find it. "When I find it, I don't need it. When I need it, I can't find it. Good grief"!

Pattern is stitched on the fabric of your choice using DMC threads. Stitch count is 90 x 91.
Getting Old Ain't for Sissies - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  $617
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Well, this one about says it all - getting old definitely AIN'T for Sissies! "Getting old ain't for sissies. It takes strength, courage and tenacity...and that's just to get dressed in the morning"!

Pattern is stitched on White Aida using DMC or Anchor threads. Stitch count is 143 x 133
Talk to Myself - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$7.50  Sale $638
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"Or course I talk to myself when I stitch. Sometimes I need expert advice"! Absolutely - frequently need expert advice - and where better to get it from than - ME.

Pattern is stitched on the fabric of your choice using DMC threads. Stitch count is 101 x 105.
Lots of Stuff - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$7.00  $665
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"I had a lot of stuff to do today...now I have a lot of stuff to do tomorrow"! Well yeah - that's my usual day.

Pattern is stitched on the fabric of your choice using DMC threads. Stitch count is 92 x 96.
Wonder Years - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$7.00  $665
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At my age, it's sooo easy to 'wonder' where I've put things. Someday to be found, but not necessarily when I'm looking for them. "I've finally reached the wonder years. Wonder where I parked the car. Wonder where I left the phone. Wonder where my glasses are."

Pattern is stitched on 14 count White Aida using Dmc threads. Stitch count is 103 x 116.
A Nap - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  Sale $552
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Oh yeah! I used to be the energizer bunny - but NOW - I love my naps. "You know you've grown up when a nap is no longer a punishment but a reward"!

Pattern is stitched on the fabric of your choice using DMC threads. Stitch count is 125 x 105.
Nothing Done - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$8.50  Sale $722
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And, the older I get, the less I get done in a day. "Some days it takes me all day to get nothing done"! Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 102 x 79.
Patience Tested - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$7.00  $665
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Well, that would be me for sure!

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 107w x 92h.
So Much to Do - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Iris Originals
$6.50  Sale $552
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Pretty much says it all -

Pattern is stitched on 14 ct Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 93w x 94h.
Patch Patch Patch - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Kooler Design Studio
$9.95  Sale $895
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Are you feeling your age??? After 40 it's Patch, Patch, Patch! A whimsical celebrtion of the joys of reaching "matu-rut-y". Stitch Count 51w X 75h. Finished size on 10-count 5" X 7". Model stitched on 10 Count Cream Tula.


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