Funny Cross Stitch Patterns Page 3

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue...Poo - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
$6.00  $569
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Cross stitch pattern from Cross Stitch Wonders featuring an absolutely great DOG Saying / Phrase! Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue Thank You For Feeding Me And Picking Up My Poo. Perfect for any home with dogs!

Pattern is stitched on the fabric of your choice using DMC floss. Stitch count is 117w x 139h.
Happy Funny Frogs Rounded Squared - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
$8.00  $759
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Cross stitch pattern from Cross Stitch Wonders featuring five happy funny frog designs. Each design is 35 stitches wide by 35 stitches high. Great as magnets or ornaments. These are a fun stitch whether stitched on fabric, plastic canvas, perforated paper or on their matching wood blanks!

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I Just Want To Drink, Cross Stitch, and Nap - Cross Stitch
by Cross Stitch Wonders
$7.00  $665
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Cross stitch pattern from Cross Stitch Wonders featuring a great saying for any crocheting enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea ....Cross Stitch and Take Naps! Included in chart are five beverages and also five color combinations for you to choose from. Licensed... Read more
Deja Poo - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Dirty Annie
$9.00  $854
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This cross stitch pattern from Dirty Annie's Southern Style says "Deja Poo - a feeling that one has see or heard this crap before."

The model was stitched over 2 threads on 32 Ct. Shadow linen from Picture This Plus with Weeks Dye Works floss. Stitch Count: 70x70. Finished size: 4.37" x 4.37".
Arrive Late - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Dirty Annie
$11.00  $1044
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This cross stitch pattern from Dirty Annie's Southern Style features the saying "Better to arrive late than to arrive ugly!"

The model was stitched over 2 threads on 32 Ct. Grandpa's Shop Rag linen from Lapin Loops with Classic Colorworks and Weeks Dye Works floss. Stitch Count: 120x85. Finished size: 7.5" x 5.3"
Fat Pants - Thanksgiving Cross Stitch Pattern
by Dirty Annie
$13.00  $1234
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Cross stitch pattern from Dirty Annie's Southern Style featuring the phrase "Happy Thanksgiving, Get your fat pants ready"!

Model was stitched on 32ct "Winter Moon" linen from Zweigart and trimmed with "Chickie" poms from Lady Dot. Stitch count is 104 x 145.
Trophy Husband - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Dirty Annie
$9.00  $854
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Note from designer: My husband was pleased as punch when I designed this chart in his honor and mark my words, Your cowboy will be just as tickled when you stitch this up for him!

Model was stitched on 32ct linen. Stitch count is 63 x 63.
Real Men - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Dirty Annie
$9.00  $854
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Note from designer: That's right ya'll! Real men have curves! I don't know about you but I prefer my cowboy with a little meat on his bones!

Model was stitched on 32ct Witch Tina linen from Fairy Wool in the Wood. Stitch count is 51 x 60.
Hot Showers - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Dirty Annie
$9.00  $854
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I take really Hot Showers to avoid burning in Hell!

Model was stitched 2 over 2 on 32ct "Boneyard" Linen from Be Stitch me using threads from Classic Colorworks and Weeks Dye Works
Fun and Games - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Dirty Annie
$15.00  $1424
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Don't drop your nuts!

Stitched on 32ct "Medusa's Gaze" by Lapin Loops using threads from Classic Colorworks, DMC, Gentle Art, Threadworx, and Weeks Dye Works. Stitch count is 139 x 99.
Size Matters - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Dirty Annie
$13.00  $1234
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Your cowboy will be pleased as punch when you stitch this one up for him!

Model was stitched on 32ct Mudders Milk linen from Lapin Loops using Weeks Dye Works and Classic Colorworks threads. Stitch count is 93 x 96.
Sentence Enhancing - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Dirty Annie
$13.00  $1234
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Some call it Swearing...I call it Sentence Enhancing!

Model was stitched 2 over 2 on 32ct Gray linen from Weeks Dye Works using threads from DMC. Stitch count is 121 x 73.
Big Dill - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Dirty Annie
$15.00  $1424
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This little dill is actually ya really big dill! The chart was conceived of during the wee hours of a cross stitch retreat when my tablemates and I were a bit punch drunk from Stitching for 2 days!

The little beads are included with the chart! (50 of each color plus a few extra)

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The Higher the Hair - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Dirty Annie
$11.00  $1049
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The Higher the Hair the closer to Jesus!

Model was stitched on 32 ct linen from Be Stitch me using threads from Classic Colorworks, Colour and Cotton, The Gentle Arts, Weeks and Wisper from Rainbow Gallery. Stitch count is 83 x 54. Finished Size: 4.6 x 3.0.
Meowerlyn - Cross Stitch Pattern
by December Stitches
$12.00  $1149
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Cross stitch pattern from December Stitches featuring a cat dressed as Merlin doing magic!

Pattern is stitched on 25 ct White using DMC threads. Stitch count is 78 x 170.
Be a Mystery - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Forbidden Fiber Co
$10.00  $899
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This cross stitch pattern from Forbidden Fiber Co features the phrase "If you're going to be an open book, be a mystery"!

The model is stitched on 32 count Belfast Linen. Stitch count is 150 x 95. Finished size is 9.4" x 5.9".
I Have Wi-Fi - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Artmishka
$694
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Cross stitch pattern from Artmishka featuring the phrase "I don't need you, I have WIFI"!

Model stitched on 14 or 16 ct Aida on the color of your choice using DMC floss. Stitch count is 71w x 79h. Designed by Anna Gutova.
You're The Butter To My Bread - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Artmishka
$849
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Cross stitch pattern from Artmishka featuring the phrase "You're the butter to my bread"!

Model stitched on the fabric of your choice using DMC floss. Stitch count is 72W x 61H.

Finished Size:
aida 14 - 14 x 12 cm (5 1/4 x 4 1/2 in)
aida 16 - 12 x 10 cm (4 1/2 x 4 in)
Housework Never Killed Anyone - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$6.00  $539
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Model stitched on 32ct. lambswool linen using Weeks Dye Works and Gentle Arts Sampler Threads. Stitch count: 109w x 45h.
Life's Journey - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Bobbie G Designs
$6.00  $539
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"Life's journey is not to arrive safely at the grave in a well preserved body but rather to skid in sideways totally worn out shouting holy cow what a ride".
Model stitched on 14 Ct. White Aida with DMC floss.
Stitch Count: 84W x 144H. Design Size: 6" x 11"
Aged Wine - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Bobbie G Designs
$6.00  $539
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Pattern by Bobbie G Designs featuring some wine bottles with the phrase, "Wine gets better with age. The older I get the better I like it."

Model stitched on 14 count white cloth using DMC. Stitch count: 44W x 140H and the finished size is 3.14" x 10".
Resting Froggo Face - Cross Stitch Pattern
by BAD Stitch
$6.00  $569
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Resting Froggo Face. This design is beginner friendly, using standard DMC colors. Consider swapping out the celestial elements in the witch hat to DMC etoile or your favorite shiny floss. Finished projects from this design are easily finished in standard embroidery hoops or picture frames. Pattern is printed on one sheet, in full color, front & back.

Stitch count is 50w x 61h.
CawCawPhony - Cross Stitch Pattern
by BAD Stitch
$10.00  $949
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Relieve your stress by screaming like this bird! The bird is fashioned after a magpie, using standard DMC floss and easy to finish in a 5x7 frame if stitched on 18 count. The printed pattern is in full color, with colored blocks and symbols.

Stitch count is 76w x 116h.
Drive a Stick - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sue Hillis
$6.00  $539
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"Yes, I can drive a stick." Model stitched on 30 Ct. Lilac linen by Weeks Dye Works with Sullivan's floss. Stitch Count: 80H x 58W.
Just One More Episode - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Puntini Puntini
$12.00  $1079
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"Just one more episode and other lies I tell myself"

Pattern is stitched on 35 ct Cocoa from Weeks Dye Works using DMC threads. Stitch Count: 103 x 63.
Sharkshund - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Romy's Creations
$12.00  $1079
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Pattern is stitched on 32 count linen with DMC. Stitch count: 96 x 75.
Stabby Squirrel - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Romy's Creations
$12.00  $1079
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Cross stitch pattern from Romy's Creations featuring a spicy squirrel stabbing fabric with a needle!

Pattern is stitched on 32 count hand dyed linen with DMC and Romy's Creations threads. Stitch count is 67 x 69.

In addition to DMC and threads listed, Romy's Threads are also required: Barbara's Pumpkin, Tuscan Experience, Scarlet, Brown Sugar and Charcoal.
Scissor Sleuth - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Silver Creek Samplers
$13.00  $1169
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Cross Stitch pattern from Silver Creek Samplers featuring the phrase "My heart doth brim with discontent. I know not where my scissors went"!

Stitched on 18ct Aida using DMC threads. Stitch count is 133 x 54.
Cross Stitch Cardio - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Silver Creek Samplers
$13.00  $1169
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Cross Stitch pattern from Silver Creek Samplers featuring the phrase "Cross stitch is my cardio. My backsides have never looked better"!

Stitched on 18 ct fabric using DMC floss. Stitch count is 178 x 63. Finished Size: 10" x 3 1/2".
Winter Puns - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Stitchy Prose
$10.00  $899
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Meet the final installment of my seasonal pillow puns, Winter Puns! Embrace the magic of winter (or daydreaming for tropical weather) by stitching these adorable snowmen. "Go with the snow" "License to chill"

Stitched on 32ct Raw Natural Linen by Zweigart using Weeks Dye Works and DMC floss. Stitch count is 60W x 60H each.
Happiness Potion - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Twin Peak Primitives
$8.00  $719
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Model inspired by our lovely White Cat Sugar Boy'. Figures are belonging to his daily routine. Cat owners can divert the white color to their bellowed one's colors

Pattern is stitched on 28 ct. Zweigart Cashel Linen Evenweave with DMC floss. Stitch count is 80 x 92 and the finished size is 5.72" x 6.57".

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